The Legacy

So for those of you who don’t really know much about me, I have Cystic Fibrosis. It’s something I have always struggled with emotionally. Physically, I have been pretty damn lucky. But when it comes to the emotional side I have always felt so “detached” for lack of a better term. I ignore it, I make light of it, I always act like it doesn’t bother me every single second. And I think recently I’ve discovered the reason for the “lack of connection” to the emotional side of it. and it was just that- A LACK OF CONNECTION. My family and I have recently partnered with a well-known individual who has his own cystic fibrosis foundation. He focuses on that connection which is desperately needed in the cystic fibrosis community. Don’t get me wrong, the amount of research that organizations such as the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation does is incredible and most likely I wouldn’t be sitting here writing this to you had they not made such great strides in that aspect, but what about hugging a mom and dad with a 6 year old son with Cystic Fibrosis who stay up worrying every night about what their son’s future holds?

What about meeting (and my meeting I mean waving a screaming to each other from across a bar) a 31 year old “B-E-A-U-tiful) woman who underwent a double lung transplant and is thriving and did I mention stunning? This foundation does that. I have always felt like the reason for my lack of emotional connection with my own disease is because something always felt like it was missing. You can even ask my parents. My mother swears that growing up, the cystic fibrosis “community” was non-existent. They may have even purposefully kept us away from each other for fear of infections or bacteria being passed from one person with cystic fibrosis to another, essentially contaminating each other. This foundation, The Colton Underwood Legacy Foundation, has given me purpose that I so unknowingly desperately needed. I finally feel like I belong somewhere. I have “people” and I can give back to those families and individuals who have had cystic fibrosis impact their lives in so many different ways. Watching an 11-year old become an honorary Tennessee Volunteer cheerleader, or a 6 year old play laser tag, bumper cars, and do a ropes course with Colton, just fills my heart with so much joy and hope for the future. I feel full, complete, satisfied.

Not to mention that these recipients are receiving life changing medical equipment from Afflovest that without insurance can cost $16K a pop. I don’t know about you but I don’t have that type of money to throw around willy nilly. And for us, its not really an option. We HAVE to have it. So if you haven’t looked into what this foundation does or the impact it has I highly recommend checking out the website at

Another thing that you should know about me is that I LOVE WINE, more importantly, a good rose wine. And what’s better than a wine that supports a good cause? Nothing. Literally nothing. So I’ve been given a unique opportunity to offer a 10% off code for all orders of the very special legacy wine label. Please visit for your order today as quantities are limited. And I’m not gonna lie, you may want to order as much as possible because who knows how long it will be in stock. I am for sure stocking up. Us code “EMJAY10” for 10% off your order today!


-Becoming EmJay

The Revelation

This is where it all starts, or should I say, this is where it begins again. Life is what you make it. And for me, it seems to have been nothing more than making it from one point to another. Hey, but what about the in between? Shouldn’t that be part of the journey too? This life that I have lived thus far has been so much about the next things, and the thing after that, and the thing after that, so much that I think I have lost touch of what it all means or what it should mean.

Those of you that know me know what I struggle with and why but for those of you who don’t, let me informally introduce myself. I’m EmJay. I have cystic fibrosis. I’m a mother, I’m a fighter, I’m the most genuine individual you will ever meet. I don’t apologize for it and that’s ok. I’m not particularly religious, but I have my beliefs. With that being said I’m pretty sure Jesus didn’t say “you have to tell the truth, but only if it doesn’t hurt someone’s feelings.” Anywho, back to me (insert hair flip). I’m wild, unapologetic, unfiltered, and unstoppable. Society may think they have control of my ways, but, boy, were they wrong. That’s where this idea formed. The idea that I can have a “safe place” to rant, to talk about whatever whenever with whoever (that’s you). 

I want you to know what I’m all about. Well to be honest I don’t know yet! I am evolving every second. So are you. This is the important part though. WE GET TO CONTROL HOW WE EVOLVE. Join me on this journey and see what you can control in your own life and what you can’t. I’ll talk about my life with cystic fibrosis, art, food, fashion, design, and anything else that tickles your fancy (or mine, cause hey, why else would I be doing this?). Oh, and another thing. If it offends you, don’t  let the .dontgiveafuck hit you on the way out. Xoxo.


p.s. Yes I’m Gossip Girl

“The difference between my darkness and your darkness is that I can look at my own badness in the face and accept its existence while you are busy covering your mirror with a white linen sheet. The difference between my sins and your sins is that when I sin I know I’m sinning while you have actually fallen prey to your own fabricated illusions. I am a siren, a mermaid; I know that I am beautiful while basking on the ocean’s waves and I know that I can eat flesh and bones at the bottom of the sea. You are a white witch, a wizard; your spells are manipulations and your cauldron from hell yet you wrap yourself in white and wear a silver wig.”

C. JoyBell C.